hurray for 2016

aha! at last i get to collect my thoughts and passwords again in retrieving my accounts in blogger.com
lots of things went on and on and with my roller coaster marriage, my kids and oh i now have three beautiful kids, 

i know right i should have been blogging away all my thoughts about them about my daily life with them and how it went and so on and so forth and now... but i did not... i end up bitter. no i'm not gonna type it here. ok. bitter not because of them. bitter of something else. 

just some spark of somethings on my day while waiting for my rice to be cooked! and wanted this to tell to my husband. 

Most of the time i hate appreciation. Because i end up doing things a lot of things alone. So better stop that appreciation thingy and do your actions. I don't need you to clap your hands in praise of me(did you ever? Nign!!!) In praise of others na lang. I want your hands to help me in everything i do. I don't want your eyes to just look at me in awe or in disgust or in anger. I want your eyes to to focus on what we are supposed to be doing. I don't need your tongue to speak about me. Oh well you don't talk to others gali and even to me we don't talk that much because we always end up looking like we are quarreling not even to a point where we understand each other's sentiments for we both have our own closed view of the conversation... we stopped talking with an open mind... i end up most of the time hurt emotionally for i feel less i just dont know if you have felt it. damn im so good in hiding it and thank you blog. yes i have flaws too i admit that but at some point did you ever thought about your flaws and correct it as much as possible? have you even said im sorry to me?most of the time i feel tired and im getting sick of the situation, im trying to comprehend things on my own even you and yes im sick of it that I wanted to puke it out on purpose, but these does not or do not affect my love. 

 Oh thank you for letting your heart beats for us.... but please dont let desperation or anxiety or beat it. 
Now hold my hand oh shit did you ever hold my hand? Ftw!